When people without children ask me how my little guy is doing, I usually respond by telling them he’s an asshole. 99% of the time, they are delighted with my candor, having steeled themselves for a long-winded poem about my... Continue Reading →
You know the difference between a cook and a chef? No? Me neither, because cooking’s for nerds. But I guess I already started this blog post, so I’m going to go ask my husband. Stay right here and don’t touch... Continue Reading →
I started the year sick with a stomach bug. Unfortunate timing, I can hear you thinking sympathetically. Except those of you who are thinking it sarcastically. Well, thanks - and I mean that sincerely for the former and equally as... Continue Reading →
I’m having a great moment. I feel like a bomb-ass mom – I’ve finished the laundry, done the shopping for the week, packed for my business trip, took my son and the dog out to the park for some fresh... Continue Reading →
I know you all think I’m this amazing, fearless, wonder woman with a can-do attitude and an ass that won’t quit, but I have a confession. I’m about to admit something on the internet that nobody should know. It’s shocking.... Continue Reading →
Dear Claire, For crying out loud, I forgot how salty you were. You think I didn’t see you making your way through the park, clearly on your way to a boozy meal with what will probably be very little nutritional... Continue Reading →
Hey, you. I see you. I know you. I am you. You’re the pale girl on the beach. No, don’t get embarrassed! It’s ok! I would tell you not to be so paranoid, but we’re on the beaches of New... Continue Reading →
Dear Claire, Damn, girl. Dan and I were just walking through the park, on our way to boozy brunch, and I saw you. You were in a playground, pushing your kid on a swing, and you looked so happy and... Continue Reading →
My son turned one year old a few days, so naturally we had an EPIC RAGER!!! Jeez Louise, uptight fellow parents, take the sticks out of your tushies. I’m just kidding, it wasn’t an epic rager. ‘Twas only LEGENDARY! SEE... Continue Reading →
ladylike nonsense 