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ladylike nonsense

for ladies – hoes, skanks, and basic bitches also welcome…

shut up and take my regular insurance payment

Would you guys call me an old Republican man if I told you that I’m suspicious of automatic bill payment programs? Yes, you absolutely would? Godammit, then go read that Julia Child blog and leave me alone. That seems like... Continue Reading →

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cordially, Claire – the best things in life are free (through theft or demand)

Hello Claire, I run a small business which is mostly creative-driven. I’ve worked hard and landed myself some great press coverage that I’m very proud of. However, I just found out that one of my vendors is using my business’s press coverage and photos of my designs on their own website. That would be fine, except they aren’t giving me credit! I reached out to them several times to ask that they simply mention my business in the photo captions, but they aren’t answering me. I don’t necessarily want to lose them as a vendor, but this needs to be made right! How do I get credit for the work without destroying my relationship with this vendor?

leggings are the dane cook of pants…

…In that they are really, really, really watered down pants that shouldn’t even be called pants, but everyone (whether proudly or shhh, in secret) enjoys them at least a little. I went to a LuLaRoe party the other week, and... Continue Reading →

cordially, Claire – is taylor swift still cool, or is it all about jonathan taylor thomas again?

Hi Claire, I have a teenage daughter, and like most parents of kids that age, I am struggling to relate to her. She has wild mood swings, she’s embarrassed to be seen with me, and she is on her phone more than she’s not. But the worst part is actually talking to her – she uses bizarre slang and crazy references, and I can barely decipher what she’s saying. As it’s rare for her to say anything at all to me, I feel like I need to learn the lingo of today’s kids. Could you please help me out and explain what some of the current slang phrases mean?

cordially, Claire – you can be a professional and courteous coworker and you can be one of santa’s elves, but you can’t be both

Dear Claire, I have a workplace situation that I’m not quite sure how to handle. I’m Jewish, and the guy in the cubicle next to me is Christian and VERY into Christmas. He decorated his desk with bright lights, put up a giant Christmas tree that partially blocks the entrance to my cube, and he plays Christmas music at top volume, all day long. He is also a big believer in the war on Christianity and complains about it every chance he gets. Now, I actually love Christmas, and I have no problem the decorations and enthusiasm, but the constant music, enormous tree, and frequent rants are beginning to affect my work. I don’t want to sour my relationship with the guy, as we work so close to one another and he is generally a great cube-mate outside of the holidays, so how do I ask him to tone it down nicely, without coming across as the angry non-believer?

ugly christmas sweaters are the new gay besties

Do you remember when Ugly Christmas Sweater parties first hit the scene? And we were all cracking up? And you had to call your mom and ask for your grandmother’s old holiday sweaters to wear? And everyone was so freaking proud... Continue Reading →

that’s enough, j. crew

I popped into my local mall this past weekend, for a quick five hour jaunt to look for new shoes. What kind of shoes, you ask? Well, I don’t KNOW what kind of shoes, that’s why I have to LOOK,... Continue Reading →

cordially, Claire – shaking hands, kissing babies, and punching your enemies in their g*d*amn faces

Dear Claire, I play golf with a friend once a month. He’s a pretty nice guy and an excellent golf partner, but his political views are basically the exact opposite of mine. I try to avoid talking politics with him in an effort to keep our golf games light and friendly, but he has recently decided to run for local government. His platform represents everything I disagree with, which he knows, but he has appealed to me as a friend and asked I put one of his campaign signs in my lawn. How do I tell him no without losing him as a golf buddy and friend?

cordially, Claire – queer eye for the straight mom (from another straight mom)

Claire, I am writing you with a very serious problem, and I truly hope you can help me. My 17 year old son just came out to me. That’s not the problem, the problem is that our family is tends to be homophobic, and they might not react well to his coming out. I want him to be who he is, but I don’t want him to lose his relationship with our family. Please help me manage this situation!

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